Yan's Corner - In Touch

Thursday, November 24, 2005

I have a choice

I did not feel very well one of the days last week. Probably, it was Thursday night. I went to bed early. It was about 8:30 pm when I retired to bed. I could hear little Chris walking in and out of the bedroom.

When I woke up the next morning, refreshed from a good sleep, I saw my dressing table mirror stuck with many “post-it” notes. It covered half of the mirror.

Chris has written many little notes and stuck there! There were many heartwarming words –

I love you
I am so sorry that you are not feeling well
I am sorry for making you angry sometimes
Can we go for “noodles” tomorrow morning
Wake me up early please
I promise I’ll be good
God blesses you
God loves you
God takes care of you

My two children like to write letters to me. They would put them in my handbag, or under my pillow, or on my study table. This is the first time that “post-it” notes were stuck to the mirror.

Yesterday, a doctor whom I met at the Combined Scientific Meeting in Singapore wrote in an email, “your two children must have given you many happy memories of the time in Singapore General Hospital.”

Happy Memories? My first thought was, doctors are very strange people, how could a patient have happy memories of the hospital?

A long, long time ago ....

It took me five years to have Rachel, and another five years to have Christopher. When Chris was five, we prayed for another child. Yes, indeed, I was pregnant! But, at eight weeks, I have to terminate the pregnancy because the baby was not in the womb, it was stuck at the fallopian tube. For that, Chris felt so sorry. He said, “It is my fault. I forget to ask God to put the baby in the tummy.”

The endless treatments, surgery rooms, the GA, the injections, the endless drawing of blood, the CRIB in hospital for the first three months of pregnancy, the long journey, the frustrations, the tears, the pains, tummy all swollen with no more space for injections, tests… you name it, I went through.

It was a painful journey. Should I call that happy memories?

Now and then, friends will send me some nuggets of wisdom, here are some that comes in one package –

Throw out nonessential number
This includes age, weight and height
Let the doctor worry about them
That is why you pay him/her.

Keep only cheerful friends
The grouches pull you down.

Keep learning
Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever.
Never let the brain idle.
“An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.”
The devil’s name is Depresstion.

Enjoy the simple things
When the children are young, that is all that you can afford
When they are in college, that is all that you can afford
When you are on retirement, that is all that you can afford.

Laugh often, long and loud
Laugh until you gasp for breath
Laugh so much that you can be tracked in
The store by your distinctive laughter

The tears happen
Endure, grieve, and move on
The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves
Be alive while you are alive, don’t put out
A mailbox on the highway of death and just wait in residence for your mail

Surround yourself with what you love, whether it is
Family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies whatever
Your home is your refuge.

Cherish your health
If it is good, preserve it
If it is unstable, improve it
If it is beyond what you can improve, get help
(remember? You pay doctors to help you)

Don’t take guilt trips
Go to the mall, the next country, a foreign country
But not to guilt country.

Tell the people you love that you love them at every opportunity
And always remember…
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take
But by the moments that take our breath away.

They say
It takes a minute to find a special person
An hour to appreciate them
A day to love them
But then an entire life to forget them.

Yes, I have a choice – to remember that as painful memories or looking back and said, “God, thank you for the two special gifts, Rachel and Christopher.”

0 comment(s):

Post a comment

<< Home